It's been a very hard few weeks, the build up to Christmas and then the thought of going into 2009 without Jess. I have tried to just take one day at a time not really looking too far forward. Jess is on my mind all the time i know that she always will be, i hope that there is another place where we go, im sure that Jess will be making the most of things and enjoying herself, she is not the type to sit there feeling sorry for herself. For 2009 i will be focusing on the charity pushing that forward, friends have already raised money in memory of Jess this has been donated to the Cancer Vaccine Institute who are working on the dendritic cell therapy. Also somee money has been raised by my Dad fo the Oncology research at Birmingham Children's Hospital, this is where Jess had most of her treatment. They are also setting up a research unit at BCH i am hoping to support some of their clinical trials as im sure Jess would be pleased about that. In my own way i am trying to move my life forward, but i shall never be the same person that i was, i will always love Jess and miss her with all my heart, i will also try to make a difference because of my very brave daughter,who i am very proud of.